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Found articles: 43

  • How to Keep a Good Employee: Look, Listen, Learn

     Recently a client told me a wonderful story about how a change of attitude helped her to keep a valued employee.Angry and grumbling about one of the provisions in the company policy, the employee asked for a private meeting with my client, the owner of a small sales company, and began to tell her in direct terms what was wrong. The client couldn't hear anything the employee was saying because she was too busy planning her own rebuttal strategy.More

  • Working with Difficult People: 3 Questions to Help You Turn Your Tormentors into Teachers

     The Dance of ConflictWhen faced with the prospect of meeting with a confrontational employee, the project manager of a New Hampshire insurance company heaved a sigh. Not again, he thought to himself. Every conversation with this guy is a struggle.More

  • Advocate Respectfully

     This is one of a series of brief articles on holding difficult conversations. In earlier issues of Ki Moments, I suggested ways to open communications that create mutual respect; we talked about the importance of knowing your purpose for the conversation; and we added Inquiry and Curiosity to our conversational toolbox. Here the topic is Advocacy.More

  • Be Curious - And Be A Successful Communicator

     There are many ways to improve the way you communicate. For example, you will always start things off on the right foot by opening the conversation in a way that creates mutual respect. Using phrases such as, "If you have a minute, I'd like to talk with you about something that I think will improve the way we work together," helps set your conversation partner at ease.More

  • Workplace Conflict: FAQs -- An Interview with Judy Ringer

     Does conflict disrupt your workplace environment? Read on! Judy Ringer answers some commonly asked questions on the subjects of workplace conflict, difficult people, and how to manage them more effectively.More

  • The Power of Not Knowing: Understanding Your Adversary

     Most of the time, your eagerness to get your point across guarantees that you won't. It seems the harder you push to be heard, the harder they push back.How do you create a willing listener?More

  • Being Heard: Mental and Verbal Strategies for Getting Your Point Across

     "Psychologists have found that we are each more interested in knowing that the other person is trying to empathize with us … than we are in believing that they have actually accomplished that goal. Good listening … is profoundly communicative. And struggling to understand communicates the most positive message of all.More

  • Practice Makes Perfect: Changing Your Communication Habits One Step At a Time

     We are what we do repeatedly,Excellence, therefore, is not an act,It is a habit.-- AristotleThe concept of practice applies to any skill that you want to cultivate. If you take up a new musical instrument, you will need to practice a while before you're ready to give your first concert.More

  • Communicating on Purpose

     Last week I attended an excellent 2-day workshop called "Staying Grounded When on the Spot," offered by the Public Conversations Project, in Watertown, MA. Geared to help facilitators and trainers manage challenging group moments, I found that the skills applied in a variety of settings, including one-on-one communication "hot spots."When a conversation becomes difficult, I can return to a more centered, grounded state by asking two questions:1) What is the purpose of my communication?More

  • We Have to Talk: A Step-By-Step Checklist for Difficult Conversations

     Think of a conversation you’ve been putting off. Got it? Great.More