New Study Shows The Good Life May Be The Short Life

By: Tom Attea
Submitted: 2007-01-17 11:30:31
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Love the good things in life? So we do.

Unfortunately, a new study shows that if you're content with voluntary starvation you can live longer. The proof is in the monkeys.

One rhesus monkey was put on a calorie-restricted diet, while the other one was allowed to eat till content. You already know the disgusting result.

The monkey on the starvation diet stayed significantly younger-looking and was much more acrobatic, while the monkey that enjoyed all the goodies appeared much older and less rambunctious.

Lest you take comfort in the fact that the study only included two monkeys, the regrettable truth is that other studies among far more monkeys seem to confirm the findings.

But don't trash the good life just yet. The signals are still mixed.

Dr. John O. Holloszy, a Washington University professor of medicine, says, "Calorie restriction has a powerful, protective effect against diseases associated with aging. We don't know how long each individual will end up living, but they certainly have a longer life expectancy than average."

On a more hopeful note, Dr. Jay Phelan, an evolutionary biologist at the University of California, Los Angeles, tells us, "Calorie restriction is doomed to fail, and will make people miserable in the process of attempting it. We do see benefits, but not an increase in lifespan."

How about that for clear guidance?

Maybe the best news is, there are now a number of drugs being developed by biotech companies that are intended to forestall the ravages of the good life.

So all is not lost. One day the good life may also be the long life.

Tom Attea, humorist and creator of www.NewsLaugh.com, has had six shows produced Off-Broadway. Critics have called his writing "delightfully funny," "witty," with "good, genuine laughs" and "great humor and ebullience."

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