When A Friend Steals Your Boyfriend

By: Tanya Haden Tebb
Submitted: 2008-11-10 12:53:07
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If this has happened to you, you are not alone.  Catching your boyfriend cheating with your friend is heart-breaking.  Yes, it is the most terrible betrayal and it is the betrayal that hurts most.  Nobody wants a guy who cheats and if you knew he was a cheater you’d have given him his marching orders long ago, but now he cheats with your friend and it is worse than just cheating because you’ve lost them both in one fell swoop!

You can’t help but sit in your quiet moments and recall all the times that they went off together, perhaps you even orchestrated their outings together.  ‘Yeah, you guys go and pick up the take-away’ or ‘I’ll meet you guys at the restaurant’ and you turn up late to find your friend and your boyfriend cozily in conversation sharing a bottle of wine!  And you know, but you don’t want to know so you tell yourself to pull it together, you’re being pathetic, you’re being jealous!  You put on your best smile maybe even your sexiest dress and you keep on going, only to regret it later, because you will always regret not following your instinct.  Your instinct is like your lighthouse in a storm and if you ignore it don’t be surprised if you land up on the rocks.  The lighthouse is there to guide you – trust it!

So, they’ve been cheating and you’ve found out.  Here is the best way to handle it:

1.  DO NOT let them see how upset you are!  People who carry on a relationship behind your back are for the most part doing it for the thrill factor – why add to their pleasure by losing your cool?  Let’s face it:  Do you really want this guy who cheats?  NO!  Do you really want this friend who betrays?  NO!  Have a good cry you deserve it and then be done with it.  There is no friend or boyfriend that cannot be replaced and you deserve better.

2.  Buy yourself something nice.  Better still buy your self something sexy!  There is a guy out there who is right for you and thinks you are gorgeous prepare to go out and get him.

3.  Take some time to yourself.  Fully accept the betrayal.  Let the parties involved know that it hurt and leave it at that.  If you like to wallow in the pain do it, but make sure that the wallowing has a time frame, even set a reminder on your phone if you need to and when that alarm buzzes let the pain go and move on.  Don’t hold on to it or lock it away, just let it go, that way it won’t come back to haunt you.

4.  Get yourself some better friends!  It takes time to make good friends, perhaps there are some old friends you haven’t been in touch with for a while who you can make contact with again.  An event like this is a definite indication that you need a new inner circle, so put your best foot forward and start making new connections.

5.  Pamper yourself.  Pampering yourself is the answer to so many woes.  Manicure, pedicure, massage, facial go wild, even buy yourself flowers!

Yes you need a man, but you need yourself more, because when they have come and gone it is you who remains.  Love yourself - your are a Goddess!

Article source: Expert Articles