Groom's Best Men

By: Vlady Peters
Submitted: 2007-01-17 16:24:00
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Few people have not heard the story of the tragic hero Cyrano de Bergerac. Skilful with his sword, and his pen, with the golden tongue of a nightingale, with a woman he could only succeed if he kept his face in the shadows. It seemed Mr. De Bergerac had the kind of nose that was a real turn-off. Jimmy Durante’s "Schnozzola" had nothing on Mr Bergerac’s monstrosity. And these, unfortunately, were the times where plastic surgery was as yet unheard of.

Knowing how persuasive he could be, less talented male friends would sometimes engage him as a mentor to help them get the woman of their dreams. Being a good-hearted sort of a man, he actually promoted the marriage of one of his friends to the very woman De Bergerac would have wooed for himself, if he didn’t have the nose.

There were times in history where men were honest enough to admit that wooing a girl was simply not their cup of tea. Sure, they wanted a wife. But it was not in their nature to sit at a woman’s feet, compose poems, and strum a balalaika while making a twit of themselves singing some airy fairy nonsense.

Being real men, they were hardy drinkers, indomitable fighters, and generally hard-fisted loud-mouths. As to women, they didn’t know how to begin to cultivate their interest.

Vikings in particular, being more prone to pillaging than womanizing, were badly hit when it came to trying to win a woman on her own terms.

Knowing his own limitation, this kind of a man had to use guile and muscle, instead of the gentle forms of seduction. Keeping an eye on the girl, and an ear to the ground, he waited as some better wooer than himself did most of the hard work. Then as soon as he found out when the marriage was to take place, he was ready to do the rest.

Getting together with all the best men of his acquaintance, he gave them the spill. Would they help him in his mission to get himself a wife? Would they ever! Arming themselves with knives, clubs, sticks and swords, these stout-hearted men would sally forth to the church. No sooner did the minister ask whether anyone knew of a reason why this couple shouldn’t be joined, than he got his answer.

Of course, the wooer, having done all the hard work, was not likely to just let the intruder take his prize away. Knowing that this kind of attack was on the cards, he too had not only brought with him all the best fighting man of his acquaintance, but hid a stack of swords and lances behind the altar in anticipation.

It is from these early days of pitched battles between the wooers and the non-wooers that our male attendants have their origin. Today, we differentiate between the best man and the rest of the groomsmen. In the old days they were all equally the best men the groom could find for the job.

Vlady Peters is an Australian Civil Marriage Celebrant authorized to perform marriages in Australia. She also performs general ceremonies such as Baby Naming, Renewal of Vows and Commitment Ceremonies. To learn more about Vlady, visit her at http://www.weddings-celebrant.com

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