Osama Bin Laden Saved Israel

By: Karen Fish
Submitted: 2007-01-17 16:24:14
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File this under the truth is stranger than fiction category. Michael Moore made some excellent points in his documentary Fahrenheit 911, especially that Charlton Heston is extremely vain, and likes to give interviews underneath his movie posters. Perhaps he actually believes that he is Moses. If not for Osama Bin Laden most Americans today would not know the location of Afghanistan, the correct spelling of Farenheit, or that the Fahrenheit scale was named after the German physicist who invented the scale, G.O.D. Fahrenheit.

Most people care more about their own severe paper cut especially if it is to their cornea because they can feel the pain than they do about genocide in the Sudan because they cannot feel the pain. The urethra burning question today is do you spell it Hizbollah or Hezbollah? The question is, how does a 6’4” Muslim on constant dialysis and a $25 million price on his head evade capture by the most sophisticated military force in history, with satellite imagery that can read the fine print in your marriage contract from 200 miles above the earth? On top of that he is sending movies and audio tapes to al Jazeera every month. Can the CIA not trackback the courier to the mastermind’s lair? Comment on that Blogospherians.

The problem with Michael Moore’s Movie, aside from the obvious alliteration is the point at which he chose to begin his little tale. It is always important to start at the beginning. Every story has a beginning a middle and an end J. Lo. Don’t be fooled by the oil that I’ve got, I’m still Jen Jen Jenny from the block. What is the beginning? According to Darwin you have a series of monkeys beginning to stand up until they sit down again in front of their computers with a sense of megalomania that people are actually listening to their blogs and that they are making a difference in the world. According to the Pope humans were created by God 6500 years ago despite the fact that Lucy’s bones are 3.5 million years old. Facts have never stood in the way of religion. You can insult the Pope all you want for selling people bogus tickets to Heaven for chanting “I love you Jesus please forgive me.” Business is good. But what about the congregants who have purchased bogus licenses to murder for chanting “Jesus please forgive me” and 5 dollars into the collection plate? The end of this charade is our extinction soon.

It is so easy to see insanity in others but impossible to see it in ourselves. Did the 50 million Christian Germans goose stepping and Heil Hitlering at the 1936 Berlin Olympics realize that they were following a madman to their total destruction? Do the 1 billion Muslims Zieg Heiling along with Hizbollah and their black facemasks and green bandanas realize that they are following madmen to their complete and utter destruction? God said, “To Muslim man and woman I love you all but how can you destroy the Jew, this is not love.” God of Mount Sinai aka Allah, Jesus, God the Father, Tony Bennet, The Holy Spirit, Hashem, Adonai and Elohim carved in stone “Do not covet your neighbor’s ass, or anything that is thy neighbor’s.” (Exodus 20:17). Is J. Lo reincarnated? Was she with Charlton Heston in the desert? Muslim greed is about to trigger the Apocalypse. Both Christians and Muslims are deliberately triggering the Apocalypse because in their minds this is the only way to bring about the advent of the Messiahs Jesus and the Mahdi. According to these geniuses, these German physicists, the way to bring about the 1,000 year peaceful reign of Jesus Christ on earth is to render all life on earth extinct in nuclear world war 3 and its aftermath nuclear winter then ultraviolet summer. Ultraviolet summer will make global warming feel like winter in Iceland. The world is a lunatic asylum for the criminally insane. We are about to blow. Nothing you can blog can stop the inevitable. The writing is on the wall. The world religions lead only to war – there is no provision for peace inside of them. For that you would need to follow your God of Mount Sinai into the Temple of Love – The World Peace Religion, but the people of Earth have been brainwashed by their religions for 4 millenia and they aren’t about to lay down their cards now as their eagerly anticipated Armageddon approaches. Their last words will be “Look we were right – the world is blowing up!”

Muslim greed is about to trigger the Apocalypse. The Muslim people own 99% of the Middle East real estate and 100% of the Middle East oil, which is 2/3 of the world’s oil supply. The Muslims have enough land and money right now to build every Palestinian an exact duplicate of Candy Spelling’s home in Bel Air. Oil isn’t much good for camels but cars love it. How could Henry Ford have imagined when he invented the car that 100 years later it would trigger Armageddon? One would think that the Muslim people would realize that they had a Royal Flush right now. But they are not satisfied. They are throwing away a card praying 5 times a day on Persian rugs that they will be dealt Israel. They are risking it all for Israel, which is the size of New Jersey and has no oil. The Muslim people have been lulled into a false sense of security by their victory in Iraq against the Americans and their victory in Afghanistan against the other superpower, the one with the oil, Russia.

What the Muslim people have not taken into account is that in Afghanistan and in Iraq the Soviet Union and the United States of America played with their hands tied behind their backs. They never used their enormous stores of nuclear, biological and chemical weapons – yet. The Hiroshima and Nagasaki nuclear bombs were 50 kilotons. Today’s nuclear bombs are 100 Megatons. Think kilobytes and Megabytes. The United States of America has 25,000 nuclear bombs and so does Russia. It’s all a chess game. The United States has surrounded Iran with permanent bases in Afghanistan and Iraq. Syria with their chemical weapons is surrounded by Israel and by the US in Iraq.

In order for Jesus to return, the Jewish people must be in Israel. After 911 President Bush announced a Christian Crusade against Islam. Does anyone really think that President Bush will allow Bethlehem to fall into the hands of the Ayatollah Khomeini, that Jenna Bush will need the Ayatollah’s permission to visit Nazareth? The Muslim Holy Place is the Kabaa in Mecca Saudi Arabia. Does anyone really believe that George W. Bush, Ann Coulter and Michelle Malkin are going to allow the Muslim people to set up nuclear suicide rockets on the beaches of Haifa and Tel Aviv? By knocking down the twin towers Osama Bin Laden gave the Americans a serious paper cut to their eyes and now the neo con bloggers running the American political machine are screaming for the blood of what they call the Islamo Fascists, the Islamo Nazis.

The Republicans will never allow Ahminedjad to acquire nuclear weapons, not ever. Had Osama Bin Laden not knocked down the twin towers and the Pentagon on 911 then today America would be looking at Hezbollah in Lebanon as another suicide bus bomb attack in Tel Aviv. They would have said “Big Deal.” But now that they have gone through 911, the Americans are prepared to send their children to stop the Muslim quest for world domination. Israel must thank Osama Bin Laden for saving their country. If not for him the United States today would not be saying, “This is all the fault of Syria and Iran. We must conquer the Middle East Oil fields. We cannot allow them to fall into the hands of Osama Bin Laden. He will take the money and buy nuclear bombs from Russia and China and North Korea and fire them at the United States of America. If anyone tries to take Israel we will conquer them. Bring em’ on!”

The Americans played possum in Afghanistan and Iraq and the Muslims fell for it. The US Israelis will now provoke Damascus into firing their chemical weapons to give them an excuse to use their WMD’s to conquer the entire Middle East overnight. Muslims, “Do not covet your neighbor’s ass or your neighbor’s land.” (Exodus 20:17). Otherwise you will lose all that you have. Your greed will be your undoing. Allah carved it in stone himself on Mount Sinai 3,200 years ago this Friday. Hold onto your Royal Flush. Allah has given you the world. Open your eyes. Just sit back and buy the New York Stock Exchange and every single share. With oil at $77 it should only take 10 years. Think of all the keywords you can buy: “camel, oil, Allah, virgins, webcams, burkas, Israel.”

Karen Fish is a writer currently living in Los Angeles California. The Temple of Love http://www.thetempleoflove.com/.

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