Magnetic Attraction, You Are The Company You Keep

By: Kunbi Korostensky
Submitted: 2007-01-17 16:39:40
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Does the expression "birds of a feather flock together" or "like and like attracts each other" say anything to you? If it does, you may not have linked the saying to yourself and to the kind of people you have around you.

If you truly want prosperity, happiness and success, it is imperative to be aware of the people you attract and surround yourself with. You cannot aim for exceptional transformation in your life, while continuing to keep with the old gang of mediocrity or as some people call them 'duds' who drain your energy.

This, however, does not mean you have to go around ditching all your old friends and colleagues. Taking such an impulsive action can plunge you into another deep end, where you could find yourself all alone.

What is required of you is to develop strong, clear inner awareness, if you're seeking to transform your life. Everything in life is governed by the natural Law of Motion. This is responsible for regulating your inner evolution which eventually manifests in your world.

In other words, your inner development determines the outer changes around you.

Let's say you came to the realization that you've outgrown the kind of life you've been living until now. And you have a strong perception to turn things around. What happens is that your vibration changes because of your inner shift. Things which have formerly meant something to you, no longer fascinate you. Same thing goes for the kind of people around you. The magic is gone.

You start to feel drawn to other kinds of people. Especially, if you consciously determine the kind of people you want to be with.

I have observed this process on many occasions with myself. There was a particular time I felt that certain people around me were holding me back. What I did was to search within myself for the hidden reason I had for keeping those friends.

As soon as I was honest with myself, I was able to recognise what it was. This was because they looked up to me and made me feel special. Talk about miscrossed 'self communication'! With my inner awareness also came the strength to escape from my self-alloted imprisonment. In time, my dissatisfaction created a natural distance to those friends who no longer were ideal for me. The result was a natural separation.

There are numerous reasons why people hold on to old relationships even if it is killing their image and getting them nowhere. If you find yourself wanting to hold on to a stale friendship try the following:

1. Write down what it is you think you're getting from the relationship on one piece of paper. On another piece of paper right down what irks you about the relationship.

2. When you've finished jotting down all the points you can think of, put the two sheets of paper aside for a day or two.

3. The next time you pick up the lists read through them quickly while asking yourself "what kind of relationship do I now require from this person, and am I getting it"? Again, write down your answers.

4. Next, ask yourself what kind of relationship you want to reciprocate with the person, and if you are giving it now. If you're not, what is holding you back? Be really honest and write down your answers.

5. Now take the list of what you least like about the relationship and cross check it with your answers to the kind of relationship you now require and what you would like to give back.

My guess is that you'll be surprised by what you find. I have done this simple exercise several times with various people and by myself. What it reveals is often amazing and can help clarify things for you. Because it elicits true perspectives.

© Kunbi Korostensky N.D., Psychotherapist and Certified Life Coach specialises in supporting people dealing with life changes, such as after a divorce. Check out her ebooklet: Top 10 holistic Questions to Embrace Change and Grow at http://www.embracingchanges.com.BooksandCDs.html

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