The Face of Fear In Our Lives

By: Betty LaMarr
Submitted: 2007-01-17 16:41:17
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What reasons have you been giving yourself for not living the life you love? Maybe when you thought about the job promotion, you told yourself “they don’t think I am good enough,” or “I’m not really ready for this kind of responsibility." Maybe you said, “It will take too much time away from my family." Fear looks like being afraid to ask for what you want or being afraid to create a new possibility for yourself that you haven’t seen before.

What if you were able to design your promotion so that it meets your needs, the company’s needs and your family’s needs? Creating a job you enjoy is what you can do when you allow yourself to imagine the possibilities. Once you imagine that you can have the job, the house or the dream vacation, that is the beginning of creating the path to getting it. With proper planning and creative thinking, almost any situation can be used as an opportunity to begin to honor your desires and priorities for your daily life

How many times have you told yourself, as you sat in front of the television, “one day I will take a vacation and go to Hawaii or Africa”? Now you realize that was more than 5 years ago and you still are no closer than you were back then. What about your friend who has been telling you for the last 10 years that they are going to buy a house. Now they are about to turn 40 and they still don’t have a plan or a down payment! When you look at these situations you can safely say, this is the face of fear!

As a Professional Empowerment Coach, when I deal with clients, no matter how accomplished, successful or courageous they are, fear and anxiety seem to play a role at some point in all of our lives. Often, we allow our fears and anxieties to stop us—to determine how much we are willing to risk and to determine how much we are willing to limit the goals we pursue. I see fear, the primary obstacle, showing up in four (4) primary ways:

(1) Fear shows up as that small voice in your head, I’ll call it a GREMLIN, which tells you that you are not worthy or not capable. This is usually very emotionally charged and stops you from moving forward.

(2) It shows up as an ASSUMPTION—based on a past event that causes you to assume the outcome will be the same as it was in other situations. The message you give yourself is: Why bother---there is no point.

(3) INTERPRETATION—How you interpret an event. Remember how you can have several people see the same thing but describe it differently? You interpret from your “box” or through your lens. The message: How I see it is the only way it could be. When in fact, there are many ways to interpret the same situation. Lastly,

(4) something we refer to as a LIMITING BELIEF—which is the belief that something outside of us controls what we are capable of being or doing. For example, there will never be an African-American President of the United States or this is not a job for someone who comes from your family background.

When you are ready to live the life you love, there are alternatives to help you move forward with your plan: you may choose to develop a contract with a friend or relative as an “Energy Partner”; you may consider hiring a Professional Empowerment Coach. In either case, you share your intentions and dreams for moving forward and hold each other accountable for moving forward, one step at a time. This works because we are often more committed to a respected friend or Coach than we would be to ourselves alone. We know that someone else is counting on us to keep our commitment. Energy Partners ensure that you are surrounded with positive thoughts and ideas like your own while cheering each other on as you accomplish your personal goals.

Betty LaMarr is the CEO of EmpowHer Institute, a career and professional empowerment coaching company that has been helping ordinary people to achieve extraordinary results in their careers and life choices. For more information please email EmpowHer Institute at empowher@verizon.net and check out the website at http://www.empowher.org

Article source: Expert Articles

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